“I get a call saying my dad was not coherent and is about to die from liver failure."

"Sometimes I am angry. Sometimes disgusted. I always feel bad for the little girl who is me, whose life was forever changed because my dad was an alcoholic, like his father was."

She told me her alcohol story and about how she lost touch with her dad for many years until he was hospitalized with liver failure.

This post focuses on the personal experience of someone whose dad was an alcoholic. This post is part of our Alcohol Awareness Month (April 2024) series of personal stories.

Her alcohol story

A woman shared her alcohol story with us. She shared about how her father's drinking affected her life.

"My dad was an alcoholic. My parents were married for 10 years when they had me. My dad started drinking (again/heavily/I am not sure) again and they got divorced when I was 7 because of his drinking and his affairs."

"For a few years, he would pick me up every other weekend. We would go to a restaurant/bar that his friend owned, and I would fall asleep at the table while my dad was in the bar. During this time my mom also married a much older psychologist who was also an alcoholic. My dad got remarried, stopped paying child support and helped to raise his new wife’s 2 teen boys who were a little older than me. Those boys had everything, I was ignored."

Losing touch

She talked about how their relationship lessened. She talked about how she tried to keep a connection going. "After my first child, I reached out to my dad to share pics with him, after that he called me a few times leaving weird, drunk messages. He never asked about my child again."

Bittersweet reconnection with her alcoholic dad

"Fast forward again, I am 44 years old and I get a call from my “step brother” saying my dad was not coherent and is about to die from liver failure. I had not seen my dad since I was 16 and he had just gotten out of jail from a dwi and hitting another person. I went see him, he was awake and did live for 8 more months. I saw him a few times. Brought my kids to see him. They whole time I was nice and never brought up what he did to me. He passed, left whatever he had to his wife and her kids."

How does she feel about the situation now?

"Sometimes I am angry. Sometimes disgusted. I always feel bad for the little girl who is me, whose life was forever changed because my dad was an alcoholic, like his father was. He also had 5 other brothers, all but one was a heavy drinker at one point."